Me: [Boarding tiny plane, clutching boarding pass for seat 7C.] Pardon me, sir. I think you’re in my seat.
7D: [Smiling gently, waving boarding pass.] I don’t think so. This is 7D. I’m in 7D.
Me: No, you’re in 7C. 7C is the aisle. 7D is the window.
7D: Are you sure? I think —
Me: [Pointing blandly at useless infographic.] See there? The picture of the window. And the little man. D is next to the window. C is the aisle seat.
7D: Oh. [Looks at man sitting in 7D.] Um, I think you’re in my seat.
6D: Oh. Um. [Looks at boarding pass.] I’m in 6D. Is this row 6?
Me: No. This is row 7. [Pointing patiently at useless infographic.]
6D: Oh. Sorry. Um. Excuse me. [Soothing music plays courtesy of United Airlines, as several people exchange seats.]
7D: Well. Lucky we had you to get us sorted out.
Me: [Suspecting irony] Yes. Well. Those diagrams can be hard to figure out.